Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
