69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I want her autograph on my taint
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
