That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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