guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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