You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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