physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
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