I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
