Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
