only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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