at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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