Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
