Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
