needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
