? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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