well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
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