Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
either way he was missing a nipple.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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