Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
