Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
My feet surprised me
Randomize
