Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize