Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
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