Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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