Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
