jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
The beers last night were like the tears from god
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
