I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
