Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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