now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
