My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
