I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
