I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
