You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
