I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize