Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
