Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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