I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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