doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
