If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
