You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
