do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
