I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
