i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
