I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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