You work out of a Hotel?
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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