My room smells like vodka and shame
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
