Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize