I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Randomize
