At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
