You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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