He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
