ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
