Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
